Lurch and Tables - Gomez Investigates
by FonzFan82
Summary: This story is based on a dream I had. Also my first Addams Family story. Lurch gets upset about something and ends up throwing a table on a guest. Will the guest end up dead or survive? Find out if Gomez will figure it out!


It was a dark and stormy night. The Addams Family were out of the house doing things. Lurch, the butler, was in the kitchen preparing for that night's dinner. Fester was away on a trip for a while. Gomez and Morticia were no place to be seen but inside of the house. They had a guest over at their house. Their guest was a dark – haired brunette with blue eyes. The brunette turned out to be a woman in her thirties. She was lying on the pointy couch in the house the Addams had and had a book with her. She was reading it while their television was on at the same time. She wasn't paying much attention to the television.

She read a few chapters of her book, then later on the television got distracting to her, and then she had to put the book down. The woman, Maria with the book in her hand, the title was called _Life. _It was the latest book that came out. She was somehow enjoying it. The book was a biography by a Rolling Stones member, Keith Richards. Therefore, she put the book down in her lap. She looked up at the television. She thought the television was showing a funny commercial and so she laughed.

Lurch, the butler, peeked into the room and found the girl, Maria laughing at the television. He didn't like the commercial that was on or the laugh that Maria had. So he had to do something. So the only thing he could do was pick up a nearby table and throw it on her to make her stop. So he did.

The next thing he knew, Maria screamed. Then he heard running. He knew it was Gomez because he recognized his footsteps. Lurch noticed the footsteps were getting louder as Gomez and Morticia ran to see what the problem was. He didn't expect Morticia to be there with Gomez.

"What happened?" Morticia asked.

"What's the table doing on her?" Gomez asked.

Lurch just grunted. He didn't want to tell them the story. He thought if he told Gomez the story, Gomez would not believe him, so he stayed put and silent.

Gomez and Morticia carried the table and put it back in its rightful place. The table Gomez and Morticia put down on the living room floor was heavy enough for two people to lift. The table looked like old paint on it that needed to be redone since it was past time they thought of repainting their furniture. Moricia thought it was time to replace the table for a new one. She would mention this later to Gomez. They saw that Maria looked scared and gave Gomez the frightened look.

Maria was the first to tell her version of the story.

"I was minding my business, reading my book and watching television, and Lurch comes out, throwing the table on me. That's when I screamed."

Even Grandmama gave him the look but didn't reply.

Lurch left the living room before Gomez could tell the others he wanted to investigate.

"What do you think made Lurch throw the table on our guest, Gomez?" Morticia asked, watching as he took out a cigar and light it.

"I don't know, Tish, but it's something we're going to find out. It makes me wonder why Lurch didn't answer us and I'm going to find out why."

The next minute the doorbell sounded. The mail had arrived earlier that afternoon, so there was no way the mailman could be here at this later hour. It was one of their neighbors, giving Gomez some mail that arrived at their house.

"Thank you."

"You shouldn't be smoking those, Mr. Addams. They are bad for your health," the man told him as he left.

Gomez saw the envelope was from Fester, so he opened it.

The letter told him Fester was coming home the next day.

"Who's the letter from, Gomez?"

"Uncle Fester. He's coming home tomorrow."

She did not say a word.

"I hope you figure out what made Lurch throw the table on Maria before Fester comes back."

"Don't worry, Tish. I will."

"I need to talk to Maria. My first question is did she and Lurch have any witnesses when this happened?"

"Good question," Morticia said as the two-headed back to the living room.

When Gomez and Morticia returned to the living room, they found Maria sitting on the couch, playing a card game with Thing.

"Maria, Gomez would like to ask you a question."

"What's that?"

"I want to know if there were any witnesses at the time Lurch threw the table on you."

"I don't know. I don't think any of us were paying any attention to know anyone was watching."

"Why don't you ask Lurch the same question, dear?"

"I just might do that."

Maria did not want to think how angry Lurch was now once Gomez tried asking him the same question and she did not want to know either.

Lurch saw both Gomez and Morticia walk in.

"Lurch, Gomez has a question for you."

He looked at Gomez straight in the eye.

"Did you and Maria have any witnesses when this happened?" Gomez asked.

Lurch looked right in Gomez's eye. He didn't know how to answer this question either.

Instead of answering the question, Lurch stayed quiet and shook his head, telling them he didn't know either. Morticia could see they lucked out on the question twice.

"Nice try, dear. Any other questions?" she asked.

"Yes, one. Why was the table on Maria when we came out?" Gomez asked.

Lurch didn't want to answer that question.

Lurch had a feeling he wouldn't answer any of the questions Gomez would be asking him, so he kept his mouth shut. Morticia had a feeling Lurch had acted strange and had not answered the question Gomez asked. Once they left the kitchen, she brought it up.

"Gomez, don't you think Lurch is acting a bit strange?"

"Why do you ask that, Tish?"

"I thought I saw some bruises on Maria's forehead. They didn't look serious but the bruises look big. Do you think Lurch could have done this to her?"

"Lurch? No. I don't think it could've been him because he was in the kitchen."

"I guess you're right. It doesn't sound like Lurch to do this."

"No, it doesn't, Tish."

Lurch heard what Gomez and Morticia were saying, but they were on the right track. They haven't figured out what made him angry.

"Here's another question, Tish. If it was Lurch who threw the table on Maria and the bruises showed up, what made Lurch angry to throw the table on her?"

"Good question."

She would have never thought of that question.

"I've never known Lurch to be angry."

"Neither have I, Tish."

After being silent for a while, Gomez had a thought on what made Lurch angry.

"Tish, I think I know what made Lurch angry."

"What's that, dear?"

"Remember when you and I came running in?"

"Yes."

"I remember the television was on when we found the table on Maria."

"What was the television talking about when we were in the living room?"

"It was on commercial break. I think I saw a hammer involved in one commercial. I'm not sure if that made her scream or not."

"What was the hammer doing on the television?"

"If I could remember right, it was destroying a harpsichord. Then the harpsichord was broken into pieces after that. I think I remember seeing that commercial before, Tish. Maybe our next bet is to talk to Lurch again."

Morticia agreed.

Morticia had a feeling and didn't mention it to Gomez that Lurch might not answer. They walked into the kitchen again and found Lurch still cooking.

"Lurch, may we talk? I think I found out what made you angry."

Gomez cleared his throat. Then he spoke. Lurch looked at Gomez in the eye but didn't speak a word. He waited for Gomez to speak.

"Lurch, was it that commercial about the harpsichord that made you angry?"

Lurch nodded. He still could not speak.

"Is that why you threw the table on Maria?"

Another nod from Lurch. Gomez looked at Morticia. He couldn't believe that he had figured this out!

"Lurch, you couldn't have done this to a guest."

"Lurch, you know what?"

"What?"

"You're fired," Gomez said.


End file.
